Here is a Shopper!

There is another disorder to add the list of defects in my head. I am now officially suffering from the Obsessive Compulsive Terrible Shopping Disorder. Yes it’s a disorder which is usually found in women but in rare case it gets transmitted to men who spend too much time with them! Sorry ladies but I had to blame somebody!

Wednesday as I left office I got an SMS from the store whose name means lively spirit in le french. It said there was a Sale starting at 6 pm. Such things get me as excited as Pavlov’s dog at the ring of a bell. So I and little Nat rushed to the store as it was just past 6 and the store is like 5 minutes walk from office. We reached there only to be disappointed as the store was closed. I rechecked the SMS. It had a date indeed. It was supposed to start on Thursday. Gah!

Next day as soon as office was done we rushed. No prizes for guessing where. I saw an awesome leather messenger bag that I wanted to pick up so bad. But I went in to the changing room to try some shirts and when I got out it was gone! Dammit, it was so awesome. I would have bought it despite the fact the fact that it was going to rain for next 3 months and I would have ended up ruining it but that’s how terrible this affliction is. So with the bag gone there was no point in purchasing these nice shirts as they were actually good deals and worth while purchases. The OCTSD took control and I ended up buying an expensive coat. Yes yes another coat to add to my collection of coats and jackets. @$#%#R#@^. I probably have enough coats and jackets to dress up the entire Indian cricket team!

OCTSD itch satisfied I headed back to Malad where I was supposed to watch a movie with R. A Hindi movie. Yes I know I have been things very much out of character lately but I don’t recall being abducted by aliens or any one puking in to my mouth ala The Invasion, another stupid movie to add to my list of movies that I should have never seen. So I took a Bus and I expected to reach Malad by 9 pm with the show supposed to start at 9:15 pm.

But as usual I didn’t consider the small factor called traffic. When it was 8:40 and I had just reached Irla I panicked and jumped off the bus literally. I ran past the prostrate vehicles and took up an auto hoping it would be able to get me there faster as per the legend of Mumbai rickshawallahs. But just my luck, of all the rickshaws lined up I *had* to pick this one.

Couple of minutes in the rickshaw and I realized my mistake. Every vehicle seemed to be overtaking us! Hell I even saw the bus I had jumped off fly by rubbing my face in you-know-what. At this point getting off and trying to get another rickshaw would have wasted more time so I tried to goad him in to going a little faster but this heartless bastard showed to me no empathy. As the time ticked by I ran out ideas. I even tried paddle the road with my feet to see provide some extra “horsepower” to this black and yellow turtle but to no avail. I swear we couldn’t have been moving at more than 30 kmph on a pretty open and almost potholes free road.

Then suddenly almost magically the rickshawallah had some kind of epiphany or something. Or he remembered his days of youth, which was a surprise as the way he was driving it seemed he skipped childhood and youth and was born 60 years old. In a sudden burst of adrenaline rush he went all crazy and pressed the pedal to floor going all the way to 35 kmph! This man was nuts! I held on to my dear life as he zip zap and zoomed and dropped me at the InOrbit mall at 9:13 sharp.

I got off the rick and made my way to the theater, still shaking in my knees from that Near Death Experience of a ride. R had already procured the tickets of this movie whose name is too long to type. Someone had told me to see this movie and learn from it. Which had got me quite curious about it. They say curiosity killed the cat and had I been one I would have killed myself. Any way the movie wasn’t really bad. The newcomers did quite a decent job. The story had some loose end which could have been handled better and the less I say about the climax the better. I still haven’t figured out what happened to that one girl in the movie, who was dressed specifically to cater to the front row male audience, in the end. That shall always remain a mystery. R had a tooth removed and I got in to trouble for making her laugh.

When we got out I found she had purchased a brand new second hand car! Ooooh shiny! It was a silver color car named after a bird and in damn good condition. Hell it came with a ganesha pre-installed on the dashboard. Which reminds me I still have get a treat from little Nat who bought a new car too. She had to choose between one that looked like a submissive mouse, one that looked like a demented bug and one that looked like a ninja rabbit. She picked the submissive mouse and its red in color. But I don’t think I’ll ever get a ride in it as she has threatened to get pink interiors for it!

Now I am off to see the latest Will Smith Super Zero flick and after that if time and people permit there might be a tryst with the Green Fairy. That would deserve a blog of its own. Till then try not to kill yourself over this weekend.

5 thoughts on “Here is a Shopper!

  • Anonymous

    OCTSD. Do I have your permission to use this term sometime?
    If that’s how you spent your week days, I’m looking forward to reading about your weekend…and yeah, also about the ‘GF’ 🙂

    Have a good weekend.


  • Che


    Yay someone loves me! haha thanks man.
    Its important to seek happiness in smaller things in life becasue when we are too busy chasing bigger goals we miss out on these important things.


    Yes Madam I hereby permit you to use the term OCTSD as long as its not used to make profit. Copyright still remains with me 🙂

    Its a surprise how people think i live an interesting life. I really really dont have a life! But I try to most of the lack of it.

    I am already having a good weekend.
    Hope you do too.

  • Anonymous

    Yes, that is exactly what I like about you – making the most of every small thing, that’s a big feat dude.

    And yes, I no like plagiarism, so the copyright shall be respected 🙂


  • Che


    Oh well i do all whining in my real life so when i sit down I dont have that many complaints left.

    When you live in your own world cut off from the world at a level unknown to the world then its these small things that matter a lot.

    well feel free to use OCTSD, i have a knack for coining thing and cliches and i have plenty of those. let me know if you need some profound quotes of my own ;)_


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