Roman Holiday [Part 2 of the Part 3 of the Goa Mini Series]

What is this world coming to? I mean seriously what is this world coming to? You don’t know? Well neither do I but I have a feeling its not something good. The ominous signs are all around. Things that shouldn’t be happening are happening! Both the rum bottles bought from Goa are….still not opened. My bank balance is in 2 digits. P******m found out I was coming to work to just blog and now I am dead and buried under work. I am going home for few days. The world might just be coming to an end.

So before it does, I would like to finish the Goa mini-series so that all you people who have been waiting patiently, impatiently and threateningly for it aren’t left behind as wandering ghosts seeking fulfillment. So last you heard, I had successfully managed to survive yet another day in the boot camp thanks to my amazing survival instincts and skills. I had won the day! Yay! But the night was still to go. Crap! And in the darkest hours of the night the unleashed two attacks on us.

The first was called Business Roman. I didn’t get it. We had no clients from Rome so WTF was this? It was yet another case of a classic disability that all the management people suffer from. Its called misnomeritis. They just cant give anything a sensible name! The Business Roman had nothing to do with Romans nor was it was any of my Business. Basically they gave us a bunch of bamboo sticks, a spool of thread, 4 rubber bands, a square piece of cloth with a hole punched in every corner and a rubber ball. Oh and a piece of paper with more rules and regulations than the SEBI handbook. The point system was so complex that Ramanujan could have written a thesis on it. Of course I understood every bit of it and I have dumbed it down so you all can understand it.

Basically we had to play around with the ingredients till magically a catapult got created out of the blue and flung the ball far enough to get us some points. Points depended upon how long you took, how many people it took, how much stuff you used and how long the ball traveled. Already my team was communicationally challenged as the captain was a P*******er from China and half the instructions given to her got lost in translation and other half got lost when she conveyed them to us.

Luckily our vice-captain thought he knew what he was doing and he took control. Four of us decided to built the catapult and the other four, including the captain, were benched. We had 40 minutes to build it and we kept getting it wrong again and again and again. Finally when he had something that looked like a catapult ready I realized that the vice-captain had *did not* know what he was doing. Drawing upon my immense knowledge of Physics, Geometry, Trigonometry and Rocket Science I concluded that this was less of a catapult and more of a self destructing pile of bamboo shit. It wouldn’t work. Hell a dead body could chuck the ball further away than this travesty. So going by the position of stars, the tide timings for the day and the temperature of the air in Santa Barbara, I suggested certain changes in the design to ensure optimum projectile hurlation.

Running out of time, we couldn’t implement those ground breaking, cutting edge, out-of-this-world suggestions properly and had to quit half way through. All set to test this machine, a pure marvel of human intelligence and raw, brute power of rubber bands, we stretched the rubber bands and placed the ball just perfectly in the cloth and waited with abated breath to launch it in to the distant horizon. My vice-captain released the trigger and ……. PLOP! The ball dropped FOUR INCHES away and rolled away in disgust. WTF!

This sucked serious you-know-what! While other teams were jumping around their catapult screaming 14 feet, 20 feet 100 miles and what not, we quietly huddled around our “whatabull” acting as if that attempt never happened. Sadly we were so confident of creating a world record on the first attempt that we had used up all out resource and just enough string left to have one more shot at it. We quickly and quietly glanced in the general direction of the catapults that were doing well, not taking any note of designs and stuff of course as that would be copying. We had no time to change modify anything so we just pushed the trigger as far back as we could for our one last try. With tension mounting, we needed to clear 10 feet to get any points, we all waited for the last attempt that would seal our fate.

3……2…….1……and off it went! Ok not really but yes this time it actually stayed in air for more than few milliseconds and landed few feet away. By no measuring standards was it anywhere near the 10 feet mark but some pushing, shoving and prodding, all while no one was looking, helped it cross 11.4 feet! Yay! We did it. Ok so what we didn’t come first but at least we got something out of it!

Damn this is getting long. Need to end it here. I may or may not cover the Team Entertainment or rather Team Enterpainment as I don’t remember a lot and there is still so much to write about Goa! So what do you guys say? Is it getting too boring and too detaily and I should just condense rest of Goa in one post or keep writing? You are also missing out on all that has been happening since Goa! Chances are I will forget all that soon. Like the Crucible, Life at P******m, the gym, oh wait which reminds me that a guy at gym asked me if I was a fan of Baba Ramdev. *Note to self* It’s time to trim beard before that trip to airport.

On another hand I was asked to make a moodboard by Sree and Still. Well I didn’t know what to make so I did the best thing I could do for all you, I made it about myself!

From collage


148 thoughts on “Roman Holiday [Part 2 of the Part 3 of the Goa Mini Series]

  • Still thinking

    lol!

    Your HR is doing some serious research on inventing team building exercises, WTF indeed!

    Looked good, looks good now too 😉

    P.S: Audrey Hepburn wud hv been forced to change her debut if she knew what ‘R.H’ meant to you!

    Reply
  • Surya, the Ayrus!

    well even i do remember doign that piece of management exercise in one of our MDPs.. pity our team, our set actually tripped out and flew in the air and the ball walked down gracefully, a few inches backwards:) lolz!

    Reply
  • Neeku

    Ghosh the HR People are real pain … I don’t understand how cum they come up with the weridest of the weirdest team building and management and communication exciercises… its either they are high on something or… simply not over their boardgames age…

    anyways… the collage is neat =)

    Reply
  • Preeti

    “Already my team was communicationally challenged as the captain was a P*******er from China and half the instructions given to her got lost in translation and other half got lost when she conveyed them to us.”

    “So going by the position of stars, the tide timings for the day and the temperature of the air in Santa Barbara, I suggested certain changes in the design to ensure optimum projectile hurlation.”

    you know whats going to happen to the above two…

    its not detaily at all. (dont ask such alarming questions, dearest)

    if you have the time to write we have all the time to read…
    🙂

    and what a supercool collage. so many talents slowly being revealed…!!!

    and a simple catapult…you couldnt make… with a chinese person to lead you. arent they supposed to be like pros in such things…?

    and ya…it is certainly a good idea to do something about the facial forest before you go to the airport…

    🙂

    Reply
  • The Quirky Indian

    Ha ha ha….so, did you even get to see sun and sea during your stay there?

    I don’t think you should neglect this series that tells us how not to build catapults and how not to have fun in Goa! 🙂

    Or perhaps you should let this series go as soon as you finish ‘Part 3 of Part 5 of Part 4 of the Goa Mini Series’.

    Cheers,

    Quirky Indian
    http://quirkyindian.wordpress.com

    Reply
  • Che

    @Sree:

    Well since people in general are full of crap I decided to be full of something nice. And the nicest thing I could find was me so well you see…
    oh thats katka, a polish girl I hosted. I am a member of hospitality club and I have hosted some very interesting people over time :).
    Run run but I know you will come running back 😉

    @Jhayu:

    Being dumped with work is *never* good. Unless work involves women. lots of them.

    @still:

    No no if it was upto them we would have been playing military war games, they outsourced this to some genius.

    PS: I bet she wishes it was me instead of Mr Peck 😛

    @Trinaaa:

    If there was any award for most attentive blogreader i would give it to you. FIRST one to respond to my questions :). Lets hope others, if they do manage toread those lines, share the same sentiment.

    @surya:

    Oh yea? So we werent the only ones to suffer. good. Now now when is your next post coming up. write something. If you have nothing to write about there is always *ME*

    @neeku:

    Well we will have to get a spy in to one of the HR dept to find out how the hell they come with such ideas. glad you likey :).

    @preeti:

    I *did* put the perfect name for you on blogroll. FOUR comments already!
    Uhh well the collage erm was made with umm a little prodding and kicking and shoving of someone else too. The finishing touches I mean.
    Really? Lets see you make a catapult. No really. I would like to see that 😛

    sweetie??? leave love notes for Jhayu on his blog not mine!!!!

    @QI:

    Dude I didnt come back with goa all over my face just like that!
    I know its going on too long! I still have 4-5 more episodes but I think I will wrap it up in just 2.

    @kurtnirvana:

    Dude that hotel shit is also going to be on my back soon. Dont worry you have that airline campaign. hahahahaha. you are so dead.

    Reply
  • Tazeen

    hahaha,

    No one has ever learned anything at such exercise, if anything, you come back loathing your co workers more for their mediocrity.

    Moodboard was awesome, a little self love has never hurt anyone

    Reply
  • Che

    @quicksilver:

    So do I assume you loved the post as usual 😉

    @Tazeen:

    Exactly my sentiments, which I cant really put forth as most of them know this blog!

    haha well since no one loves me why not I love me!

    Reply
  • Che

    @Surya:

    Oh boy all you need is some good advice from the Old Monk. He really helps!

    @V:

    That will be one looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong post boy!
    I think I will end it all in 2.

    Reply
  • mystiquedew

    *lauffin like a hyena*

    che…thass outrageous..hahahhahahhahahhahahha

    So ’em Rocket scientists actually do somethin to hurl ’em thingies in the outer zone, eh?

    😀 😀

    Lovelllllllly blog 🙂

    Reply
  • Che

    @Still:

    You seriously think you will be able to do anything but smile when you see me? 😉

    @avionic:

    No No we didnt want to hurt any one in africa!

    @mystiquedew:

    *lauffin like a hyena* you do know thats not very attractive 😛
    thankie thankie. its for words like these that I waste my time writing for you all 😉

    Reply
  • mystiquedew

    want me to kick ur rearside..

    Say MD u r the most gorgeous, attractive, wonderful, breathtaking human person even wen u lauff like a hyena…

    SAY It..Growwwwwwwwwwlllllllll

    😛

    And yeps…this piece was really mindblowing 🙂

    Reply
  • Che

    @mystiquedew:

    MD you are the most gorgeous, attractive, wonderful, breathtaking human person even when u laugh like a hyena and dont fulfill your promises made to me.

    See it wasnt that hard. Anything for the ladies 😉

    Reply
  • fishbowl

    I like the mood board.. if it’s just a bit self-obsessive:P Also, I know somebody who came on the same trip as you.. HR departments can try SO hard sometimes!

    As for the rickshaw driver, he didn’t tell me his name. And, I didn’t want to get into too much personal territory.. considering he asked me who my ‘special someone’ was.. and when I would get married et al!

    Reply
  • Che

    @fishbowl:

    Well what to do I currently dont have anyone else worthy enough to get obsessed with 😛

    You *know* somebody at P******m!!!
    Egads! Oh no. My cover is blown!
    I would like HR people to not try at all.

    Ah you see my friend Bunny Singh gets rides from a rickshawallah daily and she told me same thing about him.

    Ah are Rickshawallahs the new age relatives? I am dreading going home for the same reason. The questions!!!!

    Reply
  • Preeti

    such team exercises are actually good, you know.
    team members realize how mismatched they are and their inadequacies and how they suck at simplest of things like ‘catapult making’…

    heh heh heh…

    Reply
  • Che

    @vidya:

    Thats the problem with me. I never end what I start! But chalo Ill make an exception for you 😉

    @preeti:

    Ha! you and good at making catapults! right! and I am good at writing poetry! 😛

    Reply
  • Preeti

    Maxim Gorky wrote a short story called “for want of something better to do”…

    along similar lines…such type of noises emanante “for want of something better to say…”

    samjhe…

    Reply
  • vidya

    Aren’t you nice! 😀
    Yay! I found a way to post comments on blogs! Most sites are blocked here, gives me bullcrap reason like ‘social networking and personal sites are blocked’ when I try to comment. Muhahaha..

    Reply
  • Che

    @preeti:

    You learn something from me everyday

    Vidya:

    I am nicesest but they call me narcissist 🙁

    Down with censorship! Internet is our birthright and we shall have it!

    Ok now go blog 😛

    Reply
  • copy rioter

    That catapult pissness was hilarious and that proves –
    ‘All we need is a little push’ and there we go corrupting our soles with holes not made by some catapult.

    And Che, in your rule, the world is coming to a rudeboard.

    Reply
  • Preeti

    ha ha ha…

    ive got inside information on something very very interesting, che…!!!

    i will not confound you by referring to it here. but it makes me hug myself from inside in utmost glee…

    WOO THE HOO…
    all the way…

    😛

    Reply
  • Still thinking

    Preeti, now I’m curious! what is the inside information? Can’t help it coz it’s right out there begging to be asked…tell na? please… OR is it only for Che’s ears (read eyes here)…

    Reply
  • Che

    @preeti:

    Ha you actually believe what Jhayu says about me? I didnt know you were so gullible! Damn imagine what all I could have made you believe!!!

    @Smita:

    Well both mine and the readers patient seems to be running out so I am gonna wrap it up in 2 more episodes and you will find it all there 🙂

    @still:

    elo ladies stop talking about me puhleez. it makes other men feel inadequate, i mean sad.

    Reply
  • Preeti

    still…yaar i underestimated Che, and as always he has got right back at me…so i sneak away sheepishly and his response to my weak attempt at rattling him is your answer …

    🙁

    and che…i wish i could kill you but i will slink away and let you have the last laugh…

    hmpf!!!

    Reply
  • Still thinking

    Oh no Preeti, not so soon and easy! Itni jaldi hathyaar neechey dal diye?

    You’re the only one who can take him on dear 🙂 Just admit all of the above in your mind, you don’t have to write it for him to read 😀

    Hold it Che, you don’t need to scowl, I won’t clog ur comment space anymore, atleast not with this post.

    Reply
  • Preeti

    I second still…by reiterating that i wont clog your comment space any more…
    but the point worth noting here is that i am the only one who can take you on…whether you like it or not…

    ha ha ha ha…
    gosh this is the most beautiful way to start a day…!!!

    Reply
  • Che

    @trinaa:

    Yes thats 2 wrong out of 2. But keep trying. You never know.

    And what does my copyright have to do with you being in Ranchi! I was mad even before you were born 😛

    @Preeti:

    I thought they were Norwegian. Oh well. Do you think they had any idea who I am when they wrote it? I thought so 😛

    Reply
  • fishbowl

    New age relatives 😀
    Well, ill find out a little more about you soon enough:P
    and, i know it’s a series of things.. but there’s also that one point when something clicks.. I was trying to capture that…

    Reply
  • Che

    @preeti:

    exactly my point. who dares go against what I say 😛

    @fishbowl:

    Arent relatives these days like rickshwallahs, you would only like to run in to them when you need them.

    Oh noes. A spy in my office! Ha find out more about me? Wont be that hard, my blog has made me a household celebrity 😉

    Hmm maybe you are right but it my case too many things were clicking. I probably looked like a button when I was a kid.

    Reply
  • copy rioter

    I googled the lyrics for elevation and I got the point. This is what you felt like –

    Love
    Lift me up from out of these blues
    Won’t you tell me something true
    I believe in you

    -from ‘elevation’

    p.s. – Be a little more discreet CSM

    Reply
  • Vidya

    I’m way too lazy to blog. I’m this person who has lots of patience to comment, bug others to blog but somehow thinks my blog is enjoying its well deserved sleep. Nice narcissist? Kinda hard to believe that 😛
    Ok, so when’s the next post coming up? 😀

    Reply
  • Che

    @preeti:

    You like everything I do anyway 😉

    @Trinaaaaaaa:

    elo? I am hyperallergic to the word sweet/cute +-est/er.

    @Vidya:

    Aw come on is there any one else on the net who treats their, ahem, fans better than I do 😛

    Next post will come up only after yours? 😛

    Actually I am going home tomorrow so If I dont put one by tomorrow then I wont be able to for a week :(.

    Reply
  • Che

    @gunj:

    Would my fans liked to have seen something else but me? 😉

    For the lack of better alternatives I am fine with being a *lil* self-obsessed for the time being.

    Reply
  • Che

    @mystiquedew: not where i want 😉 @pseudo: hmm. i wonder why! thank you come again :-). @trinaa:
    whats the story morning glory :p
    @d gypsy:
    just the board 🙁

    PS: pardon the delay. this is done using my phone and is quite painful! at home. back on thursday.

    Reply
  • Preeti

    @trinaa…

    album ka naam hai…(whats the story) morning glory?

    there’s a band called OASIS. they are british and have given some great hits like wonderwall, champagne supernova, etc etc. this is the name of the second album that they released.
    i can say more about the band members but i think i should not…
    suffice to say that they are mind blastingly outrageous and excellent musicians. Superbrats though!!!!

    heh heh heh…

    yaha par reference to the context kya hai pata nai…!!!

    Reply
  • Trinaa

    @preeti…thanku sooo much ji…tho u shud hv let him answer..answering thru a fone is v painful u c ;).. muaaah to u :)))

    @che…next tym stick to bollywood 😛

    ps:whn d hell IS ur bday??!!!

    Reply
  • Che

    @sree : oh ill go thru a lot more to see what my fans want say :p @keshi: i dont know why they hate a nice guy like me. @trinaa: it was a response to ownts comment that there is a story behind why you are turning all blue to wish me birthday. Preeti got the reference right. My birthday will be revealed by me when i get back or some over zealous fan who knows when it is and wants Brownie points for being the first one to wish me 🙂 @Preeti: i see you have already taken up the role of managing things when i am not around 😉

    Reply
  • rabbit

    cheers to Che on this day..

    the day a naughty alien being was kicked from the far corners of the universe to get lost….he escaped all the black holes and alien abductions to spread his love here on Planet Earth..to become the most textually offending person ever seen in blog ville.

    Happy “you know what” to you

    Reply
  • rabbit

    you are so lucky Che that i am busy with my studies….
    If it wasn’t for them,a nationwide manhunt would have been done long ago and you would have been a prisoner in my wine cellar and we all would have kicked your butt 10 times each at the clock would have clocked 12 a.m. on sept 30 ;D

    Reply
  • Chrisann

    LOVE THE NAME
    Textual Offender
    🙂
    please may I extend its use to my students whose essays bring tears of laughter to my tired eyes…
    (with due credit to you of course)

    Reply
  • Che

    @V:

    I dunno what RTI you used but i am surprised you found it! thanks 🙂

    @fishbowl/sheisturningblue:

    thankie thankie. Though mine wasnt as much fun as the one where we met 🙁

    @preeti:

    😛

    @copy rioter/ penicious punguin:

    Red or White?

    @Still:

    🙂

    @Vidya:

    Well see you are making people wait. not good innit?
    Thanks 🙂

    @V:

    To kick my tiny ass you would have to find it first!
    As long as your wine cellar had wine i wouldnt complain 😉

    @trinaa:

    Haan ji aap miss kar gaye. Koi baat nahin hum belated wishes bhi accept karte hain.

    @vaudevaaaa:

    Well unlike most celebrities I tend to make mine a low key affair. Otherwise media and paparazzi get too much to handle no?
    Keep lookin!

    @TJ:

    Its ok my child i forgive ya 😉

    @chrisann:

    thanks 🙂

    Glad to know that you have students like me! Must be a damn good teacher then 😛

    Reply
  • rabbit

    not only it will have wine but girls too..just tell me your address to make it simple..
    other wise u’ll just be delaying the inevitable.
    Ok..i will make you a nice deal..
    Preeti could share that cellar too with you ;D

    Reply
  • Preeti

    have just taken it and now i’m gonna beat it…

    (read beat it as in MJ’s beat it and not the usual beat that i always feel like doing when it comes to you)

    bah!!!

    Reply
  • Chrisann

    Am actually a therapist, but I teach psych to grade 11 and grade 12 kids of the IB program as well as this paper called the theory of knowledge, which from reading your blog I think you’d really enjoy, you’re @ Lokhandwala?
    You must come and give us a guest class on something, we’re in Juhu

    Reply
  • Che

    @preeti:

    You want me to get in to the *detail*?

    @chrisann:

    theory of knowledge? sounds damn interesting!

    Nah I am not at lokhandwala but not too far either. I stay near InOrbit and I work in Santacruz.

    Guest class and me? hahaha. You should *not* expose kids to me seriously! Besides I am barely as qualified as them 🙁

    Reply
  • Chrisann

    thought it might pique your interest, its a mini philosophical course, that is designed to get the kids to question everything from the existence of God, to the comercialization of the news, to saffronization of higher education, to whether Raj Thackeray is an alien…
    Pretty anything is up for “discussion”

    Reply
  • Che

    @chrisann:

    haha its perfect. I always had too many questions as a kid and since I rarely got satisfactory answers I all still very inquisitive.

    Ah well then you know more malad than prolly I do!

    Reply
  • Che

    @preeti:

    I was always a thinker….just that my thoughts cannot be made public 😉

    @QI:

    Ah what to say man…..just wait….the post will tell you all. Its coming up today or tomorrow.

    Reply
  • Cess

    he he, very funny one, the rocket science project … hilarious, I can pictured ur first attempt completely 🙂
    C.
    PS: and the pic is pretty cool btw

    Reply
  • Che

    @cess:

    When you see a pile of thin bamboo sticks, a spool or thread, a patch of cloth and a rubber ball, do you think catapult? I certainly dont!

    PS : Thankie again. Photoshop can do wonders! too bad it cant blog for me.

    Reply
  • Cess

    he he, actually when clicking to ur pic i found my way through ur picassa album and the famous kind of ‘catapult’ LOL, specially compare to the other one, now i pictured the first attempt even better and it s even funnier 😀

    C.

    Reply

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