A Late Monsoon Rant/ A Late Monsoon Rant

I have a problem with the Mumbai monsoon. It never comes on time and then it tries to make up for it in one day, inadvertently my weekly off. What did you say? OK Einstein that’s TWO problems. I had said one because I thought two was too big a number for you to comprehend. Good job! You are still one brain cell away from being special.

One day of heavy rainfall is all that it takes to convert Mumbai in to a modern day Atlantis. Since the BMC cannot clear the drainage system and MMRDA is incapable of repairing the excuses for roads that they have built, I believe it would be far more cheap and practical to develop Mumbai in to a Venice like city rather than Shanghai as they propose to do. Unless you have been living under a rock other than the one called Mumbai, MMRDA or Mumbai Metropolitan Road Digging Authority as it is popularly known as, is a smaller but no less eviler version of BMC aka Bombay Mismanagement Corporation. Sort of like Dr Evil and Mini Me.

MMRDA has been digging up roads in Mumbai from the time when the roads did not even exist. What are they looking for no one knows. Is it oil? Is it gas? Is it gold? Take you own guess. Apparently they lost their shame when building sub standard roads and now they are digging them up trying to find it. Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse for the Mumbaikars, BMC has declared that it is taking over MMRDA in a couple of years time.

From the Government’s point of view this will be a very cost effective and eco-friendly merger. What do you mean “How?” Do I have to spell everything out for you? BMC and MMRDA operating separately meant that the people had to file complaints at two different places depending upon whose jurisdiction the issue fell under. This meant that the Government was actually spending twice the amount of resources for handling the complaints. Oh don’t you go “How?” on me again! To handle all the filed complaints effectively the Government has installed two Paper Shredding machines, one at MMRDA office and one at the BMC headquarters. Naturally two people have been employed to make sure the complaints are taken care of in a timely manner. Now once the merger is done people will be filing complaints are one office only which that the government will need just one paper shredder to take care of them all. That’s one less machine to maintain and one less guy to operate it. Hell it will even save electricity! It’s nice to see the government taking initiatives to reduce power consumption in its offices considering the power woes of Mumbaikars. Now if only the government could find a way to use all that shredded paper to produce electricity for the power starved Mumbai….

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