Dilli Diaries – Day 1 Part 2

 

Statutory Warning : This Post is *NOT* going to be funny. I cannot make fun of NJ’s wedding dammit!

So finally the plane took off and I was on my way to Dilli. Things seemed to be getting better. I had aisle seat, I had plenty leg room, there was just one person in my row and he didn’t need any loo breaks, the airhostess was cute and the food I bought wasn’t too bad.

Hell even the plane landing was amazingly smooth. Un-fucking-believable!

But then all good things must come to an end. The plane landed on time but it taxied for bloody FIFTEEN fucking minutes before it reached the terminal!!!!!! WTF? Did they land in Jaipur or what? After sitting in my seat for ages as the plane meandered its way to the Terminal in a far, far away land, I finally got up, threw on the jacket and walked out of the plane hoping to turn in to Jack Frost at any instant.

This was Delhi winter? No way! What happened to THE Delhi winter, mere memories of which made my unmentionables wince? The weather was quite, how do I put it, pleasant. But then it was 2 in the afternoon too. I called up Niks, I was to stay with him for 2 days, and got his address. Got myself a prepaid cab and decided to trust my sense of direction and memory to find his apartment. I had stayed with him for few days a little over a year back.

Oh boy what a pleasure it is to be in a car on Delhi roads. I wish MMRDA would outsource all the road business to their more accomplished Delhi counterparts. With my D2 providing me regular supply of Rock music, the cab travel was as comfortable as it could be Only thing missing was, of course, a beer! Reached Patpadganj and proceeded to rake my brain cells to provide me with clues to solve the puzzle to his home. To my surprise I almost got it right. Almost. One wrong turn meant I was lost for 15 minutes till we stumbled upon a building that retuned my GPS and bingo! I was there.

I was welcomed by Niks as warmly as ever. Oh I love his apartment. Its stuffed with books and DVDs. Yes Stuffed. And he always has chocolates and alcohol lying around too :). I haven’t seen so many books in a place outside of a library or a book store. We caught up on life and its miseries till we suddenly remembered the whole purpose of my visit. NJ’s wedding! Hurriedly I took shower (hurriedly doesn’t justify the speed at which I was in and out) and piled on two sweatshirts and I was ready to go.

Kabira was in town and he sauntered in. Amreeka thou failed to change him a bit. Both Niks and Kabira went all traditional and stuff and there was I standing next to them wearing sweatshirts. Upon Niks suggestion I threw on the Jacket I had bought recently. And boy am I glad I listened to him!

Before Birdie came over, we gulped down some hot and yummy Maggi and then we left in the 2 cars. Kabira and Niks in Niks car and Me and Birdie in Birdie’s. Like the Airport Terminal, the Sangeet function was also in a far, far away land.

Reached the venue only to find it was out of parking space! Niks parked on the road but Birdie refused and some how managed to squeeze his car between the wall, another car and a ditch so big that his car could have easily got lost in it. He is quite brave for a Maruti owner i must say.

Saw lots of familiar faces at the party and many more unfamiliar ones. Everyone on Neha’s side had a performance lined for the day that they had been practicing for a long time. They attacked the stage and we attacked the starters. One by one of course. People were enjoying the songs and dances while we were enjoying the rolls and kebabs (all veg stuff). Oh and yea the performances of course. I don’t remember much about the performances though. I wonder why.

But I must take my hat, rather beanie, off to all those who performed. Stupendous stuff (guessing from the applause)! Heck even her Nana and Nani danced! Wow. If at that age I can wipe my you-know-what I will start believing in God! The D’Mello Villa gang also gave a performance to show we mumbai people didn’t fly in for nothing. NJ did a few item numbers, I mean dance numbers on the stage. And of course the couple NJ & NI wrapped it up with a fully bollywood style dance which included dancing around people-who-were-acting-like-a-tree. How do you act like a tree? Erm you stand still. Very still. Jhayu could never do that.

The Dinner was laid out in open and by the time we got around to eating we realised that we had eaten too many starters. There was chat, there was chinese, there was huge spread of indian food and of course garam garam jalebis! Alas hunger was on a strike. But not to upset NJ we still proceeded to eat food and have 2 glasses of Thums Up courtesy Tanno.

It was already past midnight and before we left NJ reminded us that the Malayali style wedding was in the morning at 7! Oh yea I could so see myself getting up and taking shower and reaching there on time. But it was NJ, and no one messes with NJ.


40 thoughts on “Dilli Diaries – Day 1 Part 2

  • Vinisha

    You got up at 7 am to watch a Malayali style wedding?

    My Gawd! I never attend Mal weddings. Use boring to describe it and it sounds like you forgot to add extra to ordinary.

    Reply
  • Preeti

    All you’ve done is eat …disgusting person. why didnt you do your thing on stage … ha…?
    see…it is difficult to get one’s bearings right if one has not been in a city for a long time…and you lecture me on my disorientatedness…
    hmph!!!

    Reply
  • Che

    @Vinisha:

    I never said I got up, wait for next part!

    @Paradox:

    Me too but in more agreeable weather!

    @Preeti:

    I eat therefore I am.

    @Jhayu:

    Try taking a cold shower on a cold morning some day…

    Reply
  • Fidgetyfeet

    I figured it out finally!! 😉 I should write down your blog link on a post-it and stick it somewhere I can see it often so I can laugh hard more often as well:)

    Reply
  • Tazeen

    i attended one wedding in Delhi at 3.00 am in freezing december. The reason for 3.00 am shadi was that it was the only auspicious time that pundit ji could have pulled out in 6 months and as the bride and groom had to go abroad, they agreed to a 3.00 am wedding.
    Boy, it was so much fun.

    Reply
  • aliceinneverland

    I wish MMRDA would outsource all the road business to their more accomplished Delhi counterparts…. i agree to this one but not the goddamn Dilli traffic… it sucks completely…!

    and i looooveeee the way you write… its smooth, fast and almost like a novel… have u ever thought of writing a book? i guess u would do wonders…. atleast i would buy a copy 😀 bring it on, dude.. me enticipating more drama from u…

    Reply
  • Che

    @Fidgety:

    How could you forget this! Because of you this started 😛

    @Tazeen:

    I can trace a hint of sarcasm in that!

    @Alice:

    Well Mumbai traffic isnt much better!
    Dilli traffic will get better once all metro is done.

    Elo all day I dream about some publisher discovering my blog and offering me a multi-hundred dollar book contract 😛

    I would retire to pondicherry and write my book there 😉

    Reply
  • Che

    @alice:

    Ah well its me dear! Its a surprise that publishers arent falling over each other to sign me up yet 😛
    Damn You Internet!

    @RunninderSingh:

    So the world isnt a stage? 🙁
    Fuck you shakespeare you lying bastard!
    All that acting for nothing 🙁

    I just have affinity for trouble or women who are trouble. thats it.

    Isnt being a hypocrite like the minimum requirement to be human these days? I am just trying to fit it 😉

    Reply
  • Running in circles.

    Run in andar and sing :O

    Shakespeare was quite a man who knew how to sell.
    Well he was very diplomatic in saying the world is a stage and all that.
    I mean come on if acting is a talent some have then how can all people of the world be actors?

    Well when was humanity about fitting in?
    Ever heard of survival instincts 😛
    Well I like polar bear tails.
    Is that troublesome?

    Reply
  • Che

    @Rungili blogger

    Every one is a salesman.
    Or atleast everyone in advertising is.
    It requires talent to act like a character, otherwise everyone is a brilliant actor on their own.
    I know I myself put in some Oscar worthy performances everyday.

    Well once in a while I like to know what it feels like to be a lesser mortal.
    Survival is the last instinct on my mind, I have others to preocuppy me 😛

    No that would be random, and i love randomness, its the beginning of chaos.

    Reply
  • Running in circles.

    Mmm, salesman indeed.
    Oh well, growing up teaches you to be a sell out or left out.
    So its one’s own choice, really.

    I won’t say nothing about acting.
    I prefer calling people dramatists than actors, its another level all together.
    Synonyms can be very tricky.

    I like breaking stuff to basic, it won’t work like that and all but hell who cares.
    Survival is what keeps you moving on, its a switch.

    I’m not random
    I can be a frog too, but I like polar bears more.
    But frogs are green :X

    Reply
  • Che

    @RunnOut:

    Woman thats not a comment, thats a blogpost!

    Well not all salesmen sell themselves, some sell lies and some sell stories too.

    Devil in the details…

    I have been surviving unintentionally, it just happens.

    I dont mind green as long as its not on my plate!

    @LM:

    Wooo three comments! So much love!

    Yes there are weddings and then there are north indian weddings, totally over the top.

    Must attend one of those. Sadly its hard to escape the Jazzy B and ilks any where these days 🙁

    @Preeti:

    The date for the update is still not decided.

    Reply
  • Running in circles.

    Lol I love argument for the sake of it.
    It tells me how far a person will go to justify what is right according to him.
    Im a small person 🙁
    I just want some more entertainment 🙁
    is that littil too much to ask for :X
    Type some random stuff out already :X

    Reply
  • Che

    @Runny:

    Wrong? whats that 😉
    People ave always told me that I will go far so you can only imagine how far.

    Entertainment? Is that all what I am to you? *sniff*

    Reply
  • Running in circles.

    Awww
    *giveshalfcwookie*

    Ah well I don’t agree with most people around me.
    Them about me, that is.
    Its a good thing you do.
    I do agree , though, that achievements speak, but not opportunity meets it at all times.
    Yada yada.

    *givesyoomorehalfcwookie*

    imaminionfromouterspacedontmindme

    Reply
  • Neeku

    have nothing to comment about the blogpost… sounded like any other wedding… (sorry !) … but wanted to drop in a “Heylo” after such a long time…

    So … Here it is …

    HelloJee !

    Reply
  • Neeku

    P.S: I think I ate the last pack of oreo snack =( … so none for you now…

    will save next time or bring it over next time…and yaa… atleast shaadis over offer good food and some real desi stuff… ootdhar to … boring useless powerpoint presentation of childhood and screened dating snapshots and the long oh-not-so-funny-and-long speeches of best man relatives… and…

    the only good thing is the champagne after toast…

    Reply
  • Bubbly Vodka

    You talk about Maggi like it is a tequila shot, gulping it down! Lol. And getting dressed at 7 in the morning for a wedding is plain torture. You might as well get dressed the night before and hang out at the venue! Hey, but then again, you are a male. It should take you what, 5 minutes, in total?

    Reply
  • justthinkingloud

    You know its actually quite amazin and impressive u remembered way to ur frnds place..with so many flyovers and metro stuff happening in delhi, every month ders a diversion and a pain to rememebr the routes (or maybe its just me)

    Reply
  • Che

    @runny:

    I never said I agree or disagree with them. People arent worth agreeing or disagreeing with.

    Iamidontknowwhatthefuckiam

    @Neeku:

    Well I am off for another wedding tomorrow morn in delhi 😛

    @Bubbly:

    dear in the weather if you dont gulp it down it gets cold and useless 😛
    err well I am no mortal man. i take few multiples of 5 mnts to get ready 😛

    @Cess:

    Hmm yea i probably have them somewhere. Will have to find them

    @justhinkingloud:

    Well my brain better remembered as I had no where else to go 😛

    Reply
  • Che

    @Sanely Insane:

    you know you make perfect sense.
    specially when food is all veg!

    @Deepali:

    Good time? No non veg, no alcohol? something was really wrong!

    @Shiraj:

    Creative juices being sucked out by work 🙁

    @Nattu aka Wabbit:

    Fear not, your time will come. Wait for part 4 😛

    @Banno:

    Oh no nothing like that on this trip but the next trip was a horror story. Will get to it in a while, a long long while.

    Reply

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